|
where the !@#$ am i? Can you have Alzheimer's Disease at 38 years old? It runs in the family. My maternal grandmother had it. I'm convinced it's what killed her. Actually she got run over by a truck, survived only to die two weeks later from complications. She was going for a walk, apparently forgot where she was going, became befuddled and in a fog crossed the street because she thought that green meant that SHE should go. Yesterday the baby and I went for a long walk. We were gone for a solid three hours. It was a beautiful day and I was in a great mood until, on the way home, I suddenly forgot where I was. I am not kidding when I tell you I stood there frozen at a four point intersection, the sun in my face, the baby asleep and I could not for the life of me remember where I was, where I had come from, or where I was going. It took me thirty seconds or so until it came back to me. That may not seem like a long time to most of you but to me it felt like an enternity. Scared the shit out of me! **** I am concerned my friend's nine month old daughter may have autism. She flaps her arms constantly and seems to have only one syllable of expression, "Ahhhhh". Of course I could be completely off the mark as I am a first time mom and don't know what the norm is at that age. I didn't dare say anything though for fear that I would hurt, offend or unnecessarily worry my friend. I'm sure she's just fine. As a motherless mother I am more susceptible to worrying about everything, particularly about the health and well being of my child. Every time my son so much as sneezes I'm convinced he has a cold. When he sweats I assume he has a fever. When he doesn't interact with me or look directly at me, 24/7, I'm afraid he's showing signs of autism. I know that every mom worries to an extent and wants the best for their children, but motherless mothers (you know who you are), having lost their mothers particularly at a young age, live in fear of losing someone else they love and as a result risk becoming overbearing, overprotective, and overly concerned. I wonder if hypochondria is also related to this kind of loss because I tend to be guilty of that as well. ***** My son was breastfeeding today and suddenly stopped, looked up at me with a tremendous smile, went back to what he was doing and fell off to sleep. THIS was the highlight of my day. There are so many things about him that make me fall in love daily. I can see personality traits that are unique to him and not just a baby general character. For instance, when I do something to make him laugh he stuffs his fist in his mouth to contain himself. Ultimately he ends up giving, his laughter filling the room. Also when me or my husband play with him and he's enjoying himself (i.e. when my husband plays airplane or see-saw with him), he'll open his mouth wide with expression and never closes it. He smiles at strangers, he loves it when I sing to him, and sometimes he'll wake out of a sound sleep, look right at me, smile and go back (very much like when he's breastfeeding). I'm concerned that me may miss sucking on his pacifier. I know that babies have a need to suckle, some more than others, and what if I'm depriving him. On the other hand I've noticed he's much more eager to breastfeed again. There were times when he was using the pacifier when he seemed to be losing interest. Last night we had a little relapse. He woke up in blocks of about every hour and a half. I am wondering if we won't encounter the same problem with him falling asleep at my breast because this is the only way I can get him back to sleep when he wakes in the middle of the night now. ****** As a mother I find that I lose track of the days. Does this ever happen to you? Sometimes Friday comes and I think it's still Thursday. It is likely due to the fact that when you're a mom there are so many things you do in a day, and things you were supposed to do or wanted to do but never found the time to do, and before you knew it the day is gone. I doubt that you'll ever hear the words, "I'm bored" come from a mother's lips.
|
|
welcome!
daily entrecard my other blog advertise here
affiliates
disclosure
|
